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Suddenly we are older


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A woman goes to a doctor. The doctor tells her that she only has one month to live and that the bill will be $1000. The woman replies that there is no way that she will be able to pay the doctor's bill of $1000 before the end of the month. The doctor then replies, "Okay then, I'll give you six months to live."

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An elderly couple entered a McDonald's and sat next to a table where some young people were having dinner.
The old man walked over and made the order for himself.
He unwrapped the burger, cut it in half and put one half next to his wife. Carefully he counted all the fries and did the same.
He dipped 2 straws in the soda and put it between himself and his wife.
The old woman began to eat her half of the burger, whilst people stared at her compassionately.
A young man approached them and offered to buy them another portion of food.
The old woman replied not to bother, as they were used to sharing everything.
People realized that the old man had not eaten, he only watched as his wife ate.
The young man approached and repeated his offer.
This time it was the old man, who explained that no, they were used to sharing everything.
The young man then asked the old man,
And what are you waiting for then?
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The old man said, 'There is no way you can guess my age!'
One of the Grandmas said, 'Sure we can! Just drop your pants and under shorts and we can tell your exact age.'
Embarrassed, but anxious to prove they couldn't do it, he dropped his drawers.
The Grandmas asked him to first turn around a couple of times and then jump up and down several times.
Determined to prove them wrong, he did it.
Then they all said in unison, 'You're 87-years-old!'
Standing with his pants down around his ankles, the old gent asked, 'How in the world did you guess my age?'
Slapping their knees, high-fiving and grinning from ear to ear, the three old ladies happily crowed....
'We were at your birthday party yesterday
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In a way the figuring out what to cook thing is not so funny. Didn't seem to have that problem. Nowadays I'm trying to downsize my estate and No that doesn't mean I'm going from 1/200 to 1/350. Would just like to  make it easier on my wife and kids to unload my estate.


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